Preparing for the More God Has for Me: Show Me What Isn't Mine to Carry

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7

I'm preparing to walk the Camino de Santiago again, and this year I'm doing something differently.

I'm carrying my backpack.

Everything I need will be on my back.

And when you're preparing to walk hundreds of kilometers that way, weight suddenly matters.

You don't pack something simply because it might be useful.

You start asking: Do I really need to carry this?

I'm beginning to realize I need to ask the same question about my business life.

Because I'm someone who can carry a lot.

I'm an entrepreneur, carrying things is almost what we do for a living.

When client problems show up, we solve them.

If something breaks on the website, we fix it.

When someone needs a leadership pep talk, we step in.

If there's a BIG opportunity, we pursue it.

When there's uncertainty in the marketplace, we make the decision.

Over time, we become pretty good at carrying weight.

But I've been learning that there's a dangerous assumption hidden inside that strength:

If I can carry it, I should carry it.

I'm not sure that's true anymore…

In fact, I'm beginning to believe one of the most important skills I'll need for the "more" God may have for me is not learning how to carry more, it's learning to recognize what was never mine to carry in the first place.

I'VE SEEN THIS IN MY MARRIAGE.

For a long time, I've carried this idea that somehow it's my responsibility to change my wife.

If I show up differently...

If I work harder...

If I say the right thing...

If I do enough… then maybe I'll receive the response I want from her.

And when I don't, I can become frustrated.

I can allow her response to determine mine.

I've had to learn: Her response isn't mine to carry. Mine is.

My responsibility is to become the husband God is calling me to be.

I can love.

I can serve.

I can communicate.

I can pursue intimacy.

I can examine myself…but I cannot carry responsibility for another person's heart.

I'VE HAD TO LEARN THE SAME LESSON IN BUSINESS.

When my COO went on sabbatical, there was an enormous leadership vacuum in my company.

And because I'm capable of stepping into almost anything, my instinct initially was….”I'll carry that too.”

CEO. Head of sales. And now COO.

But I've been learning to trust another leader in my company to carry that responsibility.

That hasn't merely been delegation, it's been surrender.

Because every time I delegate something important, I'm admitting…I don't have to be the person through whom everything gets accomplished.

That's harder for entrepreneurs than we like to admit.

Sometimes being needed feels good.

Sometimes being the person who saves the day becomes part of our identity.

Sometimes control disguises itself as responsibility.

And sometimes we call something "leadership" when what we're really saying is…I don't trust anyone else to carry this.

That's becoming increasingly important for me because I genuinely believe there's more ahead.

More people.

More responsibility.

More leadership.

More resources to steward.

AND HERE'S THE PARADOX I'M BEGINNING TO SEE:

If God gives me more responsibility, I may actually need to personally carry less.

I cannot lead a company 10X its current size by simply becoming 10X busier.

I cannot respond to growth by adding more hours forever. I was working 16-hour days at one point!

Eventually, carrying more requires learning how to share the load. And some things can't even be delegated, they have to be surrendered.

There are employees I love whose circumstances I cannot fix. There are financial situations I got myself into that I cannot rewind. There are business decisions I've made whose consequences I can't erase. There are things happening in the businesses of entrepreneurs close to me that I desperately wish I could change.

I can pray.

I can show up.

I can love.

I can encourage.

I can act where God gives me responsibility.

But…eventually I reach the boundary of what belongs to me…and on the other side of that boundary is God.

Peter writes:

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7

I've read that verse many times, but I'm hearing something different in it right now. God never asked me to be strong enough to carry everything; there are burdens He explicitly tells me to give Him.

That's important as I prepare for this Camino because I've been thinking so much about becoming a Godpreneur capable of carrying more.

Maybe part of becoming that next-season Godpreneur is developing the humility to say…”this isn't mine.”

Not my responsibility.

Not my outcome to control.

Not my problem to solve.

Not my season.

Not my assignment.

Not my burden.

It's God's.

There's a big difference between:

“Look how much I can carry.”

and:

“Look what God enables me to carry.”

But I'm realizing there's a third statement I need:

“Look what I've finally learned to let God carry.”

Maybe that's entrepreneurial maturity.

Not a stronger and stronger businessman walking around with an increasingly enormous backpack, but a God-first business leader who knows exactly what belongs inside it…and exactly what doesn't!

SO THAT'S MY PRAYER AS I PREPARE FOR CAMINO:

Father, show me what isn't mine to carry.

Show me where responsibility has become control.

Show me where leadership has become ego.

Show me where concern has become anxiety.

Show me where love has turned into trying to change someone.

Show me where my ability to carry something has convinced me that I must.

Give me the strength to carry what You've entrusted to me, give me the wisdom to share what should be shared, and give me the faith to hand back to You what was Yours all along.

Because if You're preparing me for more, I don't just need a stronger back, I need a lighter backpack.