Marriage Problems Lead to Business Problems. How to Snap Out of It.
My wife and I used to get into small spats that would turn into big arguments that would evolve into all out wars. To show my toughness, I’d become the opposite of a loving husband. I'd become a hate-filled war monger.
In these times of hatred, I stopped being the husband God called me to be.
I'd stop helping around the house
I'd put in more hours on the business so I can get home late
I'd spend more time at CrossFit
I'd go to a friend's house at night
I would do all of this so that I could stay away from her.
Consequently, my business would suffer for days and weeks in these times where I'd walk away from my marriage. It was a terrible cycle and part of a deep, dark time of depression in my life. I hated it.
As an entrepreneur, this is dangerous territory and I’ll tell you why.
The problem is that our minds become so consumed with fighting the war that we can’t possibly have all the energy needed for us to lead the disciplinary life required of us in our businesses. Our prayer life goes down. Our morning readings stop. We're filled with so much negativity and hate that it becomes difficult to see the opportunities God is placing before us in the business.
Married Godpreneurs…this is how SIN works!
For me, sin crept in through my marriage.
For you, it could be drugs, alcohol, adultery, pornography, illegal's business activities, or any myriad of sins that break up our relationship with God.
We all battle sin. So how do we get back on track? How do we get back in line with God’s plan for our lives?
In the book of Nehemiah, after the wall was completed, after the wall was working, after the people had heard and obeyed God’s Word, and after the Holy Spirit was doing a significant work in the lives of people – the people were changing and they started acting differently.
Nehemiah 9:1-3 says
"On the twenty-fourth day of the same month, the Israelites gathered together, fasting and wearing sackcloth and putting dust on their heads. Those of Israelite descent had separated themselves from all foreigners. They stood in their places and confessed their sins and the sins of their ancestors. They stood where they were and read from the Book of the Law of the Lord their God for a quarter of the day, and spent another quarter in confession and in worshiping the Lord their God."
What a scene of dramatic, humble repentance. The the people were hearing God’s word and it was changing them.
We see here three things the Israelites did.
they confessed their sins and the sins of their ancestors
they continued reading God’s word
they worshiped
Because I knew that my marriage had a huge impact on the mental game I needed to succeed in my business, I started to find the ways I could get out of the depressing hole I would get myself into. It all started with confession - honestly coming to God and saying, I know what I’m doing is wrong, and I don’t want to do it anymore.
Repentance gives way to a renewed relationship and the pursuit of holiness.
You must confess, repent, and move forward….for the sake of your business, your family, and your relationship with God.
This is why we entrepreneurs need to carve out time every morning to spend time with God. We can confess, repent, pray, and worship all in this time so we can align our minds with the new opportunities God has for us today.
P.S. I did a Business bible study called 40 Days to Restarting Your Business, God's Way. Check it out:
A business Bible study to help you rethink, reinvent, and restart your business, but this time, God's Way!
We parallel Nehemiah's rebuilding of the wall to your journey in rebuilding your business.
Also, coaches and Christian business leaders, you can use, edit, and repurpose the teachings for your own tribe! Check it out.